By Marta Nowinska, Swapsity
Founder
This
is the story
of a scientist, a TEDx talk and a four word question
that sparked a
swap surprise just in time for the holidays.
In early
January, I
had lunch with my old university friend—a PhD
student of
environmental sciences who has since moved to the
States. While
reminiscing about the life events and stories that have
unfolded in
the last 10 years, we jumped onto the topic of my
recent TEDx
talk about
the power of swapping.
“Wonderful
talk, Marta!” smiled Di.
I smiled
back in
appreciation.
“I
felt really
inspired after watching it. I kid you
not!”
Being an
environmental researcher, Di works at a university lab.
She shares
the lab with Meg—a fellow PhD student and her
long-time
friend. Since losing her mom to a heart attack, being
able to
reunite with her family during the holidays now means
the world to
Meg. Yet, the reality of making the trip this past
December looked
bleak. Meg was short of money, living
paycheque-to-paycheque for
the last three years, which resulted in growing
depression. With
the stress of finding money to travel from Illinois to
Virginia for
the fast-approaching holidays, her life was made
miserable for
weeks.
Around
early
December, Di noticed my TEDx talk about swapping in her
Facebook
feed. Feeling intrigued she decided to give it a
listen.
“By
the end of
the talk, I felt so inspired!” recalled
Di.
She got
up from her
lab desk and walked over to Meg, feeling enthused by
what she has
heard.
Just
then, a fellow
lab mate named Mark walked in. Mark had also
experienced the
strains of living paycheque-to-paycheque while caring
for his
disabled mother.
Meg
lamented to Mark
about how badly she wanted to go home for Christmas but
had no
money.
Feeling
all fired up
by the talk, Di uttered the four words that quickly
shifted the
entire conversation: “Why don’t you
swap?”
Mark and
Meg both
gave Di a bewildered look.
“Meg, you want
to go home for Christmas, right? There’s
something of value
you must have to give to Mark. And Mark, you must have
something
that can help Meg. There’s got to be something
you both
have,” explained Di.
Meg
thought for a
second.
“Mark, you have
been trying to finish your [scientific] manuscript for
a month,
right? Why don’t I sit down with you and help you
edit it
over the next two days?
Meg
happens to excel
at writing scientific publications, while Mark is a
terrible
writer. So much so that most people cringe when they
read his
papers. It’s a miracle he was admitted for a
PhD.
“That’s a
great idea,” replied Mark. “I need to
finish that
paper!”
Feeling
grateful for
the help, Mark enthusiastically reciprocated.
“You know what
Meg, I won’t be using my car over the holidays,
why
don’t you borrow it and drive it to
Virginia?”
Meg’s face
turned into a look of wide-eyed shock.
“Really?”
muttered Meg.
Slowly
the
astonishment dissolved and Meg’s face lit
up.
“Oh
my
goodness! But wait...wait.” Meg uttered.
“Editing your
manuscript will not be enough of a swap. How about I
also pay for
your car’s oil change to make the swap
equivalent?”
“Fantastic!” grinned
Mark.
For the
next few
days, Meg looked radiant; the stress has been taken off
her
back.
“I
have not
seen her that content for a long time,” said
Di.
“It
was such a
miracle. I felt so empowered having been able to
facilitate this
exchange. I care for Meg and it meant so much for
me".
“It
was
amazing, on all fronts. Meg got to go home to her
family, and Mark
got something out of it, and so did
I.”
As I
listened to her
tell the story and saw her eyes come alive, I
couldn’t help
but feel astounded and thrilled because of how
everything fell into
place, just in time for the holidays. Intrigued, I
asked her a few
questions to piece together the entire story.
It turned
out that
Mark had known of Meg’s woes but would have never
thought of
swapping the use of his car until Meg offered to help
him with his
manuscript.
Meg, on
the other
hand, was very fixated on the cash element. She needed
$500 and saw
is as the only way to solve her problem.
“Meg wanted
cash so badly. Why should cash be the only solution?
There’s
another way, just like you said in your talk,
Marta,” said
Di. “We think we have so little.”
“Yet we have so
much. We’re a lot wealthier than we
realize,” I
continued.
“Right! At that
time, I had no idea what Mark had to offer. Yet, I
thought I would
suggest a swap. I am enthusiastic how successfully it
went.”
“So
how was
Meg’s Christmas?” I asked.
“It
was one of
the best Christmases she has had with her family since
her mom
passed away. It was a very significant trip for Meg and
when she
came back, I could see she had her life back together.
Lo and
behold, it worked like a charm,” said
Di.
That
evening, I
called up Di to thank her for the lovely time together
and for
sharing her remarkable story over lunch.
“Have you ever
swapped before?” I inquired.
“Come to think
of it Marta, I have! I just never thought of it as a
swap though.
But now I know what you mean. It’s really
difficult and
time-consuming for me to change tubing on my lab
machine on my own.
For Mark however, it’s a piece of cake. He has
done it for me
a couple of times. Whenever he helps me out, I take him
out for
beers. That’s how we swap.”
I smiled
silently.
Swapping is such an innate thing. We have all done it,
we just have
to remind ourselves to utilize it in our daily life,
especially
when we are short of money.
“If
three jaded
‘middle aged’ scientists can swap, anyone
can,”
concluded Di facetiously.
I
couldn’t help
but chuckle.
The next
time you run
into someone needing help, try asking “Why
don’t you
swap?” and tell me how that story
unfolds.
This is a true story
however the names
have been changed at Di’s
request.
kayvee wrote on Feb 2nd 2014, 08:28
This story made me smile And I wanted to give something of value back. Thats why I am going to do something I rarely do.....to write a comment. I just want to thank you for sharing this with us Kayvee
Lyn wrote on Feb 10th 2014, 22:25
This sounds great! I'm nowhere near Toronto though, I live across the country in BC, and don't know many people yet, having just moved here. How can I start some swapping here?
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